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Autistic teen may be smarter than Einstein | Good News - Yahoo! News Singapore

H.A.P.P.Y - Happy!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi all, yep yep i havent been really updating for a month now i guess. Work is really busy and adding on to Zyon's been going to SPD for his therapies, me and the husband's been rushing here and there bringing the kids to and fro... blah blah blah...

ok, calm down. Breathe.

ok lets start over.

First i would like to say " YAY"!!!!!!!!!!!! why? Cos Zyon's been spelling the word "H A P P Y" happy!!!
I was SOOOOOOOOO Proud. Hey hey not that im not proud on normal days but i was so proud of my baby!!! I dont know if you can understand how it feels but lets just put it in this way, Zyon was still non verbal beggining of the year. And now he can spell???!!!! How cool is my boy??? LOL!!!

Alright, i know i know but hey haha let me just shoutout cos this aint such an easy task for him to accomplish! Or.... maybe he will start surprising me by accomplishing tasks that seemed impossible!! Haha im so EXCITED already!!!

Zyon's been really busy now attending preschool on weekdays and extra lessons for therapies in SPD every mondays and wednesdays after school from 3.30pm to 5pm. Looking at him being tired sometimes breaks my heart but i dont have a choice since im not able to choose the timing he has for his lessons. So every week he has two days to be in SPD and these 2 days zonya will have to go over to my aunt's place and wait for me to pick her up after work. Travel for another hour before we finally get home at 9pm. whoo.... Its really exhausting after a while.

Though tough, but we are all in this together! This feels family. The husband has to bring the kids, one to school, the other to my aunt's house then go back to school to pick up zyon. Bring him home, have lunch, shower then get dressed and head out for lessons at SPD, get dinner then head home. For me, i will have to just take an hour long journey after work and pick up zonya at my aunt's then head home in another hour's journey. Zyon has to go to school, travel here and there and get to another lesson and zonya had to travel so far, spend a whole day in another's house just waiting for mummy to get her by the end of the day to finally go home. Everyone is in this together.

To think of it this way, we are all working hard and contributing as well as sacrificing for things to work.

Sometimes i just feel thankful.

Alright, me and the husband is not exactly in good terms. But we give our best at parenting. We try.
Lets not even get me started on talking about our relationship. Lets just say we would be better as friends.

okok!! i will try to update more soon!! gotta run now since im using office hours to blog this lol.

laters!!

life's ups and downs moment..

Yesterday i was browsing my facebook page and there was no interesting "new facts", no lame videos about other people, no gossips of celebrities etc etc and i was just clicking away..*click click click*

Then i clicked on my photo albums and saw the categorized pictures of my kids thats been organized by their monthly growth.

I opened the files one by one and browsed picture by picture, looking at how much they have changed... especially zyon.

Zyon is my first born and naturally he has more photos than his sister. Each and every picture that i took of him has a different emotion. And each and every one of those pics are priceless. Pics of him growing up month by month, pics of him smiling and crying, eventually leading to being independant. The proud smiles on me and hub's face... etc. Then the pics now.

I know i shouldnt be feeling this but im a human after all. I didnt realize it but suddenly tears came rolling in my eyes. I asked myself,

"Just what happened in between then and now? The smiles, the eye contact he used to have.. where have they gone to?"

As im typing this now, the feelings are back. The negativity, the unacceptance even though im very clear on whats going on and the situation now. Its not that i have not accepted yet but i guess given to any mothers in the world, there must be once of twice in a couple of months you feel down and the sadness just clings on to you for that moment... Then its gone again.

I then updated my facebook on my feelings and thoughts... Then one of my closest friend said this to me :

me :

"Was looking at zyon's pics when he was a baby...... then started tearing... wanted to cry.... but.... i swallowed it back."

 

my friend:

"So this sweet 3-year old has to stick with his routine, makes his preferences very clear...sometimes deals with things and emotions differently, right? Maybe that's how some 3-year olds are...and some hv a diagnosis attached.

I guess today is just one of those days that hit you...why does your "normal" have to be so challenging, eh? Chin-up, Mama! It is ok to have such feelings and down days :)"

 

 

Im really grateful to have friends like that around me... and suddenly i felt stronger than before and more grateful towards life....

 

 

I love my baby boy and am thanking god i have him.... My kids complete me.

zoo then the croods!!!

Brought the kids to the zoo again!!! And this time round, we had the best time spent!!! Money well spent too!!! LOL

Went on a saturday and it sure was crowded (wow..) and the first station was the otters. Zyon stared at them like they were giant rats!!

"eeeeeeeee" was what he said. LOL

Then we went to see the white tigers, they were just lying down and not moving. My kids were like

"Roar roar roar"

But the big cats couldnt be bothered at all. Then we went to Kid'sworld and saw the small horses, rabbits and goats!!! We could actually feed the goats and so i pulled some leaves and started feeding the goats. Zyon and zonya was screaming the whole time cos the goats were really aggressive!! Then finally after much persuasion from the father and me, they plucked up whatever courage they had and tried to feed the hungry animals (while screaming).  After a while, they simply just enjoyed the process and decided they were just gonna feed the "hungry" goats all day... (-_-"')

After feeding, the goats were OS-ing in their hearts "these 2 little people have endless food to offer".

Anyways, we had to pull zyon and zonya away cos apparently "feeding" seems so fun they were there feeding for almost 45 mins!!!!! Man, the weather was a killer!! And i had to constantly pluck leaves just so my kids can feed my 10 mins worth of leaves in 5 seconds. *faints*

We were walking to our next stop and we saw the "Ah Meng's Restaurant" so i decided ok, its time to feed me and my family. So i got The father and the kids to sit down at the table while i go get the food. There were not much stalls in the food court, so i went straight to the chicken rice stall and ordered. 1 plate of chicken rice was 9.50. ('',) What the............. Well even though i really thought that the food was def not worth the money but we didnt have a choice. Either that or nothing. While eating, i told myself the next time im coming, i will pack food.

Continued our journey after lunch and dropped by the elephant's station. Usually the kids get really excited about the elephants so we were excited to show them the elephants. But when they saw the real deal, the word excitement didnt come out on their faces. Their faces were painted with the word "panick". LOL.

I couldnt stop laughing at their reaction, just staring blankly at the huge animal and not blinking at all. Then zonya said,

"(s)cared"

Lol, i said "dont have to be afraid la silly girl, its just an elephant!!" *making the trumpeting sound*

*zyon started making the trumpeting sound as well"

We stayed like a good whole 10 mins there then continued on to see other animals.

Having been to the zoo for so many times, this was the first time both my kids were wide awake and totally participating in "wow-ing, awe-ing" , didnt rain and no tantrums. It was really a good day for us. Now im so excited in wanting to organise trips like that every weekend.. haha .... im loving life!!!! When we were about to return to the exit, i got us all ice creams cos it was a really hot day, zonya and zyon each had one. The father then wanted to take out the wrapper of the ice cream for zonya but she mistook his actions thinking he was going to snatch her ice cream away and she started screaming. Even though the real deal was still in her hands, her eyes were on the wrapper and when the father took the wrapper she kept thinking it was her ice cream so she couldnt stop screaming. Seeing this the father returned the wrapper to her and when she took it back she stared at the paper and open her eyes wide and started screaming cos the ice cream wasnt in there!!! (duh~ the ice cream was in her hand the whole time) So she got mad and threw the wrapper on the floor and shake her head until we pushed her hand to show her the ice cream was there. Then in a second , she stopped and started eating. What a drama queen. Zyon was really sweet, we brought along the stroller just in case one of them decides they wanna sleep so we have something to back us up, he was quietly eating his ice cream and sharing it with me every now and then. Then he decided that its wet and sticky so he gave me the ice cream, sat in the stroller and pulled for my hand to feed him. What a clever boy dont need to dirty his own hands eh... I fed him till we both finished the magnum and he went "yay yay yay yay yay!!!" LOL

By the time we reached the exit, both of them fell asleep. ha........ seeing them sleeping after a long day, i was glad i brought them to the zoo.

When we finally got out of the zoo and headed back towards home me and the father were drained... tired to the max and sticky as well. We got home and it was almost time for dinner, so we decided since it was such a great day why not end it in a great way? We decided to bring the kids for dinner then to the movies.

Out we went , had a quick dinner and bought tics to "The croods"!!

When we were seated, they were thinking what was this place and when the screen started showing commercials they were both staring like,

"wow... what a BIG tv!!!!"

So very smoothly (thank goodness) we finished the movie!!!! And they loved the show!!! Apparently its really colorful and lotsa action!!

Tired but fruitful day!!! cant wait for another outing on weekends !

A solution finally!!

Hi all!!!!!! From my previous post talking about Zyon's early intervention program thats gonna start soon, i took the opportunity and spoke to my boss about the problem i am facing.

With my boss being a mother herself with 2 kids, each a year older than my 2 kids, she totally understand what are the problems i will be facing, so she came up with the idea that on the respective days when zyon has to go SPD, im allowed to work at home!! So that at least im there with zonya.

Seriously, i was really grateful when i heard this suggestion and i know i will def do all i can for the company from now on. Even though it was nothing big deal to some of you out there, but to me, its a big deal. Its like, the boss can ask me to resign or take unpaid leave, or work part time and salary wise negotiate again. But no. They trust me. They trust that i can still get things done and completed even if im at home. They trust that i needed this time to look after my daughter and not that im working on something else somewhere else. They wont touch on my salary and they will do whatever they can to give me raises and extra income should i require with jobs on the weekends.

Being human, i know some people (like my mum and husband) will think

"cos they dont wanna hire again and train again"
"cos they can then manipulate you"
"whatever they tell you to do you cant reject them, they are smart"

In a tone filled with negativity.

But honestly, as a human being, i didnt think of all these. These are negative thoughts. To me, i felt that the company is doing whatever they can for the benefit for both sides. And to have this bond called trust, you dont see them everywhere nowadays. The only thought i had when i heard the suggestion was

"im so grateful, thank you for your help"

Im not a saint, nor am i naive. Im just me. A person that knows how to be grateful and thankful. Nobody owes anybody anything. But knowing gratitude and being thankful makes the life easier and world a much beautiful place. Humans need to show more care towards each other and negativity just kills it all.

sometimes, sit back and think, maybe a thank you means nothing but words, however by saying thank you, shows you appreciate the person or their actions and it brings a smile to everyone's faces. Doesnt it sound good?

EIPIC program

Zyon went for his screening at SPD earlier this week, and the center assessed him, and decided on which class he is going to be allocate to and how many times a week he has to attend.

I know you must be thinking why not ARC right?

Initially, my first choice had always been ARC , and i wasnt wavered in anyway about changing that decision. Until i received a call a month later after our last appointment at KKH.  The caller was from CEL , his purpose in calling was to tell us more about the other options that we have and the purpose of CEL , the therapies in the different centers that provides EIPIC programs and the meaning of EIPIC.  You may already know, heard, found out about all the different kinds of therapies, help and about EIPIC, but its still part of the package that the caller has to repeat like it or not. But m really glad that the caller did his job even though he has to repeat and repeat himself calls after calls like a spoiled radio.

I always hung on to the decision of "no matter what happens or what i hear, the decision will be ARC". There have been too many times whereby i want something , get out to get it and come home with a different object. And coming to think abt it, this logic happens every single day to everyone at one point or another becos we all want something better. Regrets will come later. So i was determined that i will listen to this spoiled radio but my decision will be ARC. Im guilty cos honestly i really wasnt listening to whatever the caller was saying and i guess after saying the same things over n over again , he doesnt even know what he was talking about anymore. Our real conversation only started when he said and when i heard,

"The waiting time for ARC is 6months. " then continued "blah blah blahblah blah".

I stopped his blahing and rewinded , "wait,  6 months????? Oh dear ok what other alternatives do i have??"

Suddenly, the caller 'woke up' and came back to earth. And we started talking about the other options.

The reason why SPD was because its shorter in waiting time and even though its a new dept in terms of EIPIC program, they have the full set of therapists in terms of speech and occupational.  And ARC doesnt that those 2, we'll have to source elsewhere. So i decided based on these 2 facts its enough for me to have option 2 and not be too stubborn. I really hope we dont have to waste time waiting anymore.. its early intervention but by the time its finally our turn, its not early intervention anymore.

Ok, settled zy's EIPIC program issue, i thought i would have lesser worries, then comes another. While zy is in the class twice a week, the caregiver which is my husband has to be there but zonya is not allowed to be there.

OMG... how then?

Im working and hubs is with zy, who is gonna look after my little girl?? This i cant solve. Having the greatest headache cos apparently my family and relatives cant help.

So if u are reading this, drop me a solution if u have?? Thanks in advance !!!!

Cheers!

E for Eye

Im so happy and i couldnt wait to wanting to tell all of u out there what zyon "told" me.

YEAH U SAW THAT ALRIGHT, ZYON "TOLD" ME!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday night my little boy held,my hand and swung it back and front and so suddenly he stopped, looked at me in the eye and said,

"A b c d e" and points to his eye.

Get it??

E stands for Eye!!!!!!!!

Im so proud.... zyzy never fails to surprise mommy everytime..... #^_^ <3

Mommy is JEALOUS. Hmph.

Hey all!! As you can see my title, yep mommy is jealous. IM REALLY...... jealous... lol ...

Like i mentioned previously, now that im working and the father is a SAHD. Before we decided on this, i was really stressed to the max. Because to be honest, like many other mothers out there, for the kids to be with daddy???? Just seeing these seven words makes me feel like im watching a horror movie. I dont know how they are gonna spend the day, new bruises (signs of falling and knocks) and bumps will show cause daddies are just not as careful as mommies (which is a horrible fact). Another issue would be, im not there to witness the 1st of the other little things that they do... and it sucks. I witnessed their first steps, fed them their first foods, sent them to school on their first day etc etc, now that im working, i wont be able to be the first anymore..

So you see, there are so many things i have to think about and it really made me feel so worried!! if worries have mass, i think i will weigh a ton now.. tsk.

However, in my previous post, it seems the father is really doing a good job right? The kids are having a great time every single day playing in the playground that has somehow become a routine in their daily life. Its not that i dont bring them when i was a SAHM but because zyon is at an age and in a condition whereby he doesnt really understand fear and danger. So he tends to climb, jump ,run and do stunts that would make any mothers in the world scream in fear. And zonya is barely 2, sometimes i see her running, its like she's gonna fall any minute so for her to play the playground??? i must be crazy. Hence we seldom will go to the playground because i just dont have the confidence to make sure they wont fall or hurt themselves.

Let go.

I know i have to let go and let them learn how to play and train their motor skills but you know mothers, we tend to be really timid when it comes to kids having a chance that they might get hurt. Even if its 0.01% chance. So to me going to a playground with 2 young kids and myself is defintely a NO NO NO. But the father, he doesnt care.

Daddies are all about being adventurous. Daddies are all about letting them run like a horse that has just been freed. Daddies are all about, "huh? fall? wont la.. im watching them" and yes its true , all he ever does is "watch them" but not near, so when they fall, he "watch them" fall but cant get in time to catch them. To me is... WT...............

okok, im mean to make it sound like as though daddies really dont care. Let me put it in another way. Its not that he doesnt care, its just that daddies are not as :scaredy cat" as mommies. There does it sound better? Daddy thinks "you fell? pick yourself up la, it doesnt matter" so long they dont break any bones. Well , ok la to be fair, infact this helps alot. The kids learn faster. I cant agree more on its a really good way to raising healthy happy children. Not only in terms of physically, daddy talks like how a daddy should talk and not like me.. mommy is always a clown so the kids never takes me seriously even though im hopping mad. hm......

All the worries that i had previously was actually unnecessary. My kids didnt have any separation anxiety and still doesnt have now, they wave and kiss me good bye when i leave for work. you must be thinking what good and nice kids i have right? but i feel so hurt.

THEY CANT BE BOTHERED WHETHER OR NOT IM AT HOME LOR!!!!!

lol...

Nah, the fact is they are really having fun everyday la so im happy.

But hey, ya... IM SO JEALOUS!! daddy is so much more fun than me. plah!!!!!

a blog to share

http://sg.news.yahoo.com/blogs/mrbrown/turning-twelve-090136439.html#more-id


The above link is to a blog from mrbrown. I teared when i read this post, not becos its sad but its so so beautiful..... read it!!!!!

Old mac donald had a farm EIEIO

Finally saturday came and i was getting all excited that am gonna be bringing the kids to the S.E.A Aquarium. I know they are gonna be so happy especially zyon cos he is all grown up and knows alot more, understands alot more. So we got up early, packed, dressed up, ate breakfast and went to SENTOSA!!!! Only to get there and got a big shock.

If you have ever been to RWS , you will know that universal studios is quite a distance to the aquarium right? Well, the queue to get into the building was almost there!!! Can u BELIEVE it??

I couldnt.

So i went down to the ticketing booth to make sure i wasnt hallucinating becos of the glaring sun shining its glory on my head (infact was just trying to cook me and my family alive). And nope, i wasnt. The notice board says :

Queueing time : 10 -15 mins
(Not scary)
Waiting time to get into the building : 45 - 60 mins
(Wow, kindda scary)

Then the sign...

Waiting to to GET IN the aquarium : 60 - 75 mins
(WHAT?????)

I know its not much difference from getting into the building, but becos i didnt know that "getting into the building" is different from "getting into the aquarium ". So psychologically its SUPER SCARY. call me drama but if u saw the line and the number of people with a huge number of kids screaming (you'll think its war time people fleeing to seek refuge), im sure you will walk away too and come back on a weekday. Which, is what i decided. So even though i was extremely excited wanting to see my children's reaction, i had to walk away and turn back.. they werent disappointed becos they didnt know what they were supposed to be expecting. So thank goodness on that or i will be double guilty on spoiling their fun.

Me and the father then started scratching our heads on where should we go then?...... so we took the train and thought, go haw par villa? Nah... too scary.. Outram park? Change train and head to pasir ris? Nah... too far... dhoby ghaut?? Watch movie?? Nah..... what if..... and this just went on and on until we reached sengkang.

Sengkang. We decided just go to the Animal resort. Its a farm actually, and REALLY far in by driving. When we arrived, the first animal was a horse. Zyon thought it was fake cos it was quite far and it wasnt really moving.  Then came mother goose... hahaha

Ducks, chickens, birds, rabbits, guinea pigs and peacocks! My kids had fun like they were in the zoo, only this is free admission and you can actually purchase the feeds from them to feed the animals. Fun right?!! Lol zyon and zonya started screaming when the horse walked over with its big long face right in front of them cos i bought carrot feeds for it, they didnt dare to go near the horse and i had to feed it trying to act like its super fun but was cursing in my heart cos the horse was practically snapping at my hands!!!! I was so frightened!!! LOL But had to go "WOW!! YAY!!" T_T........

Spent the whole noon there, had lunch with chickens and gooses all ard us... ok la it was a fruitful day after all #^_^

Kids had great fun!!!!

School holiday

Its the end of term 1!!! Woo!! And zy can now sing and dance along with songs like "head, shoulders, knees and.toes", express himself better, in terms of physically and emotionally.. 
Friday was the last day of term 1 and the start of a 1 week holiday from school!! Wow.... 1 week.... its hard to plan for activities now that im working... how nice it'll be if we could spend time together all week! But its impossible. So, i came up with a list yesterday planning activities for the kids during the weekends n i got so excited as i plan! Yeah I WAS THE ONE EXCITED. LOL

My first destination will be to the world's biggest aquarium.... wahaha yay!!! Zy and zonya have been getting really excited when they see fishes, so i thot bringing them there is perfect! Just the other day i thot since they like fishes so much n we were in the supermarket ,i thot hey why not we go look at the fishes that ws for sale? (Of cos i didnt really read into whether the fishes were alive or not) i shouted in excitement "wanna see fishes????!!!!" The both of them started turning here n there looking for the "fishes", so i pushed the cart over n said "there!! Fish!!!" N gleamed. They stared at the dead fishes for a good whole five seconds n wailed.

I feel so EVIL. I made my kids cry.,

LOL

LIVE FISHES!! Here we come!!!!!

A switch of roles

I feel kindda guilty everytime i post a new post cos i get reminded that i havent been posting for quite some time. Haha. For those readers of my blog wanting to know how is zyon now , he is well n making progress!!!!! Lol

Ok, again let me just update abt whats been going on.... #^_^

After being a SAHM for almost 4 yrs, i hereby announce that im back in the workforce!!! When u read till here, u must be thinking "oh no, she gave up".
No no.... i didnt give up... i switched my role with the father. He is a SAHD now #^_^.
Okok i know what you must be thinking now.. "man with 2 kids??" Hahaha !!!! NO WORRIES. Hes been doing that for the past 1 week and i can vouch, he is the Good house father. His daily routine has been driving zy to school then me to work, off to the market with zonya , prepare lunch ,bathe zonya, pick zyon up , have lunch sometimes at the garden he just "found" if not then at home, bathe zyon , read books or do some art or writing , then they take their nap while he cleans the house, prepare dinner, bring the kids to their daily outdoor playground fun then pick me up to go home.

This is why i can go back into the workforce with peace...

But i do miss my kids.... ya... i have separation anxiety.....

As for zy, he is making alot of progress in terms of speech. He can say things like dog when he sees one, and says ow or oh oh when he falls and just the other day when my mum came back from overseas he ran to her n called "po po"!!! Fo those who dont know wat po po means, it means grandmother in chinese. We were all shocked and praised him so much! and maybe becos i have been going to work, everyday when he comes to pick me up in his daddy's car, he gets thrilled and SUPER excited to see me!!!! Never fails to make me feel so loved..... sigh my baby boy, i love u soooooooo much....

some videos for sharing

http://youtu.be/G43qNZjmfz0

http://youtu.be/AX5iEDQYE2E

http://youtu.be/DkcbjLtD0ws

http://youtu.be/Z0GogzLwsC8

http://youtu.be/SkFwhR-qYp4

http://youtu.be/h99eu6EctPU

http://youtu.be/TilyDpobc3A

So very impressed!!!!

Went to a school open house today and i was awed, impressed and determined to send zyon there for his primary studies.

Its a special school catered for children diagnosed with autism. When i arrived at the school this morning, first thought that popped into my head was "wow, zy is going to love it here". Second thought was "omg, zyon IS gonna love it here" . And after walking deeper into the premise, reaching the auditorium, my third thought was "WOW, ZYON IS GOING TO LOVE IT HERE". I cant express that thrill i felt at that moment in words, but every step that i took in that school, just made me feel 'oh-so-right'. Every step i made makes my eyes well p in tears. YES, THIS IS THE PLACE I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR. The place i had pictured in my mind ever since i tried walking into the world of autism, my son's world.  I just didnt know that such a place REALLY exists!!!!!! Now that i've found it, i dont wanna lose any chance and miss it.

The environment is clean, bright and airy, everything is handled in a great order, the classrooms are filled with information and routines, each student is being cared for by their personality and kept in track according to their likes and acceptance of their daily activities that we take for granted. In short, this is a place of acceptance, help and respect. Their curriculum consists of social and life skills, and not to forget of cos the usual subjects.

They take note of every single small details that even we as main caregivers of our child miss!  If like me you have a child with autism im sure u know the kind of dedication n devotion we have for our child and yet it never occured to me that such small details like the different water taps you see in malls and public places would be quite a problem! Or maybe its jusﹰt me?? Im guilty.

They have a huge library , gym and hall for PE. Bakery, com lab, science lab... etc. Its just perfect.

God, pls let me get a spot for my baby!!!! Will update more!!!

A little info for sharing !#^_^

Watch "Essentials for Educators: High Functioning Autism & Asperger Syndrome" on YouTube

Progress n updates

Its been a while and zyon's been growing up day by day...

I've been really busy hence the delay in updating on zyon's progress. Plus everyone in the family has been taking turns in falling sick, the usual sore throat and runny nose... plah.... Oh and not to mention Chinese New Year just passed!!!! Busy like a bee..... buzzzzzzzz.

okok enough of ranting nonsense just to fill up the space while thinking how im gonna start writing this post hahahah *embarrased*

The good news is, Zyon has been really responsive but towards me the most :p now when i call out to him, i dont have to keep repeating like as though he cant seem to hear me, but he responds immediately. Running to me no matter where he is. Im so happy!!! Its like hey this is one of the things people tend to take for granted. However, lke i said , to me only.... hm....

The bad news is as he grows, i realised he is starting to have routines. Issues like his toy fell to the floor, he'll pick it up, throw it on the floor , pick it up again, throw it down, pick it up, throw it down and pick it up, then moves on with the toy finally in his hands. Or when zonya takes the toy from him, he will take my hand to gesture me to take it back from zonya, and when i got zonya to return him the toy, (which she will) then he takes it from her, return it to her and get my hand to take it from zonya. In other words he wants ME to take it from zonya and pass it back to him...

I have been waiting for Zyon's EIPIC program to start and i have specifically chosen the center where waiting time is a month's time. Thinking its really good that zyon can start early. But its almost 2 months now and nobody has informed me of anything yet. But zyon's school is doing something. HAHA. YEAH THE SCHOOL IS DOING SOMETHING.

Apparently, there is a special needs teacher in his school thats been liaising with him for a while now and she calls me from time to time to let me know about his progress in school. We've been working together rather closely now and the school is as nervous as i am in regards to the start of Zyon's EIPIC program. Finally i am more or less assured that this aint as bad as i thought. School's been quite ok and they've called, wrote and spoke to me. Lets see how it goes from here #^_^ Peace!!!!!!!!

im a super proud mother

hey... havent been updating for the longest time... phew... its been an overwhelming period of time.. ok first let me update on the last appointment in KK Hospital.

We brought zy for the appointment with the Psychologist in the hospital previously. Well, this time round, even though i felt its always "the same routine" , i kindda like the psychologist. Okok maybe becos she seemed so sincere and nice :)  When we arrived, she was so bubbly and fresh , calling out to zyon. I liked that. Probably because im so sick of professionals looking at my son like he is a "thing". An object. But this psychologist, shes nice.
When we started the session, she asked me questions that i think just KK alone, i have repeated like at least 6 times... even though on the file it already stated EVERYTHING (stare blankly). Anyways, she then started to play with zyon according to the system called..... hm.... ok i forgot what its called but its a series of toys and levels to see how he fares. She told me to just sit there and when im needed she will let me know. So i thought ... ok. I then kept very quiet and sat there watching them like a nosey stranger.

After her 1 hr session with zyon alone, she scribbled notes on her paper and told me to get zyon to do this and that. Zy cooperated nicely... *tink tink* hahaha then she started explaining to me what is her overall diagnosis.

She diagnosed my little baby boy " Classic Autism " - High functioning.

sigh.................

The reason for my sighing was because when it all started, i was hoping it isnt autism that im facing. But it turned out yes. Then i was hoping it would not be classic... turns out...... sigh........

However, she added that she was very optimistic about zy, because he listens to instructions. When she told zy to keep the toys, he did what he was told to do. So i told her that zy understands instructions given. And the best part was zy actually returned all the toys to her when he was told to!! even i was surprised!!!! He did really well. I then told her, "i read that children with Autism are very focused on certain things hence they will be able to excel in that area, m still trying to figure out what is zyon's strength, what can i do to help him?"
She looked at me with a surprised facial expression, then answered, "his strength is being able to understand everything! Children with Autism usually are not able to do that but for zyon, the reason why im so optimistic is because he is able to understand everything!"

I was shocked.

WOW.

At that moment, i felt so proud of my little boy. Its not that im not proud of him before knowing this, but im extra extra proud when i heard those words coming out from a professional psychologist!!  But i felt a little sad after fully digesting it. Because it would have meant that zyon had undergone a certain amount of pressure to be able to achieve this and it must have felt bad... although im always there, but as humans we all have moments of loneliness... but we are capable of expressing and talking to friends or family to make us feel better. For zyon, its hard for him to express and he is non verbal yet.... it must have been really hard on him...

Anyways, after that appointment, we went for the last appointment in terms of his diagnosis.  The doctor told me again what the psychologist said and explained in a more detailed manner. Then i asked her about school.

"Can u tell me after all these years of seeing so many children diagnosed wth Autism, what are the chances of zyon going to a mainstream school?" i was so nervous when i asked her this that i felt like puking.

"hm....... i guess you will have to consider pathlight or eden. To be able to go to a mainstream school, im looking at 10%. "

*sigh* Thank goodness i already checked out these 2 schools 2 months ago and already jotted down their opening house date in my schedule book... Thats y mental preparation is very important!!!! Thank goodness im not ignorant. haha

Well, even though the chances of zy not being able to attend a mainstream school is high, but im not sad. So long as he is happy and healthy, really, i have no more complains. Special school would be much better because basically im not looking at As and acedemic results from zy... just so long he makes friends and interact with other people, im happy. Mainstream schools would be too pressurizing for my baby. I rather not. So, see it aint such a bad thing after all. :)

I must say zyon taught me alot of things about life. Good and bad. Im so so proud of my little boy. I really wanna thank god for giving me my precious son.

"Zyzy.... mommy will be by u and love you for the rest of my life. Lets hold hands and walk side by side until you find your partner in life to continue that journey with you...  i love you..."

Family support is very important

You know when you meet with problems be it big or small, your family should be there To support u, but the sad fact turns out to be No. I have been staying with my,mother since i moved back n she has no idea what autism is all about. This i dont blame her. I will provide the information if need be becos most of the time i dont think she accepts the phase of "acceptance".

She disagrees on my decision of sending zy for certain therapies and thinks im making a mountain out of a hole. To her, zy isnt all that bad, which i agree in certain aspects, and as long as we think he doesnt have a problem, he will not have a prOblem. this i cannot agree.  By ignoring zy's condition is not going to make it go away n zy get cured miraculously. I then went for workshops and each time i came home feeling full of hopes, she would then make snide comments or think that its completely useless... am so fed up with her on this issue. She thinks that im living in my own world and not listening to other's opinions. In other words, her opinion. She thinks by sending zy to her religious teacher, he will b able to cure him. this i do not agree and suddenly she thinks im the reincarnation of evil. Wtf.

Science n logic is evil??

She kept emphasizing that im living in my own world. Sorry but may  ask who in this world doesnt 'live in their own world' ? The right word to describe is "selfishness".

There is no right nor wrong in life, only different in mentality. Just because she cant accept my way of leading my life n teaching my children, doesnt mean that im living in my own world. It just means that i dont want to live in HER world.

I dont know what the key to happiness is, but the key to misery is defintely pleasing everyone but urself.

Sorry mum, i dont wanna b u.

very disappointed in teachers nowadays...

Hey, its been a while since i last updated.. been really busy lately and whatever time i have left for the day went to my bed.. haha.

ok, just came back from sending zyon to school and i am really upset so i can hold it no longer, i need to  vent it out.

Sending zyon to this kinder was a recommendation from KK Hospital. The doctor mentioned that this school can take in children diagnosed with special needs. Upon hearing this of course this school is my first and only choice!! I remember speaking to the Principal and she saw zyon herself on that day , agreeing that he met her criteria and i was so happy!

School started and its been a week.

So far i must say its too early to tell. However, im very disappointed in his teacher and today, the Principal. I send zyon to school everyday and pick him up everyday too, this will give me the opportunity to talk to zyon and remind him what he is supposed and not supposed to do. Things like "zy you must listen to the teacher and share toys with ur classmates ok, no tantrums needed alright?" Children with special needs especially Autism, they need to be constantly reminded and told so that it gets "programmed" in their mind and slowly it becomes part of their everyday life (im not sure if this works for other people but it sure works for zyon).

Patience is the no.1 key being a teacher. (correct me if im wrong) Be it being with children with special needs or an average normal student!!

On monday, his teacher told me she needed to talk to me when i went to pick zy up from school, so i said ok and waited for her. She then asked me, "he doesnt sit still when im reading the children stories and he tends to walk around, and when they were having the sports ball session, he cried and cried upon seeing the teacher who is a foreigner with gold hair. Why ah? I dont understand. And he seems to have some issues with listening to my instructions."

I was shocked.

To me, the first thought that came into my mind was, i have already spoken to the Principal on the issues and problems that you may face, i asked her if i needed to talk to you, she says its ok she will do so herself. Now it seems you 2 have not communicated at all with each other!! And secondly, as a teacher, you know that there will be a child with special needs in the case of autism in your class for the new term, after work, google and read up on children with an autism condition to know how to handle la right???? See how different are they from normal average kids isnt it????? I dont need you to study everyday on how this condition comes about or what but just a brief reading on their characteristics and you will know why they behave like that la!!!! Its like, you are working with children, preschoolers, you must know how to work with them so you can teach them! It doesnt have to be a child with special needs to push you to do this, just being a teacher you have to walk into the "kid's world" and speak their language so you can work with them smoothly isnt it? And now you have a child with special needs you dont bother to find out??? If children with special needs like autism is like you working with an average kid so easy then why must there be a term called autism? or kids with special needs? OMG!!!!

But, i didnt tell her all these. I told her nicely why zyon reacts the way he is and went home to write down briefly about the characteristics on children with autism. I dont know if she's read it or not but as a parent i have done my part in the explaining and noting down for your knowledge.

This morning, becos it was still very early, i was outside the assembly hall singing songs with zyon before he goes into the hall. The Principal came in throught the school gate. She saw me and zyon, dont bother to say anything and wanted to just walk pass, then i looked at her and said "good morning" and smiled. Then she repled "good morning". When she sees other parents, she says "hi! good morning" in a way that i wasnt given. What is this? Discrimination?? (you may think im being sensitive, but hey i have observed her a week cos i see her everyday)

When its finally time, i brought zyon to the hall and went to the other side to peep at how he was doing and how his teacher is handling him. I couldnt hear what they were talking to him about but because he wouldnt sit down and wait, he walked around. Different teachers went to him and got him to sit down but then he will stand up again and wants to walk to his classroom. Until his class teacher stood up and went to him. Before all these, she was happily having a conversation wth the rest of the students and she didnt talk to zyon. Then when she went to him, she held his hand and walked back to the sitting area and told zyon to sit down. But again he stood up after a while and this went on for 3 times. Her facial expression was straight, no smiles not nothing. Just straight. Then when zyon's classsmates gradually arrived and walked in, her smiles came back on them and said "good morning". As a parent, i feel its like handling my child is a chore is it? What is wrong with you????

Zyon's strength is his "being able to understand whats going on". Its just he isnt able to express. If you are genuinely nice to him, he will listen to you. Its been like this towards doctors, psychologists, relatives and my friends. So what does this tell you??? Is there no teachers who teaches with passion anymore in singapore?

The ache in my heart for my child... it never goes away...

Will it ever go away?

1st day of school

School started on the 2nd of jan this year!!!!! Zy's been going to school for the past 3 days~
School starts at 8.45am and i started getting zy to wake up at 7am to get ready, but he couldnt haha my little lazy bom bom. Finally i managed to get him to open his mouth for milk at 7.30am!! When he finally finished, it was time to get dressed and stuff, and he was awake!!

Initially my plan was to get him dressed and we could leave at 8am and we will have time for me to walk him to school since its quite near our place, but the sky looked really dangerous  (rain may come any moment) so i thought maybe we should just take the bus then. As soon as we reached the bus stop of his school, true enough it started pouring. Thank goodness we were already there!! phew!!

Day 1!! Parents were supposed to follow the kids for the whole session (2hrs) for the first week, and of cos i went with zyon and zonya was in my toddler carrier the whole time. You must be thinking y i didnt bring the pram right?? haha!! BECOS!!!! It was raining... so i took the bus instead of my original plan of walking to school with the pram~ lalalalala okok when we first got to the school, there were so many parents and children around, wow... i was very excited. Then a teacher came over and asked what class does zyon belong to? So i told her that i wasnt told when i registered him , but i do know which is his classroom so she told me to bring him there. When i got there, another teacher came along and asked what is he name of my child and i told her then officially zyon just walked in sat down and started playing his toys. So experienced lor... lol...

Zonya seeing her brother playing toys with so many other children she started struggling her legs wanting to come donw and play together then i kept telling her no, this is not a playground, "kor kor" is in school now.... but the little one wouldnt give in. Then the class teacher started talking to the little kiddos about what they were supposed to do and did a simple orientation for the kiddos. They were showed around the school and told which is the place for sports, which is the room for which activity and where the toilet is. Zy refused to hold on to the loop that they were supposed to hold on to and kept getting distracted along the way.. the teachers were patient enough to guide him :) When we were back in the classroom, his teacher then said to keep all the toys and take a sit on the floor infront of the black board. Ah ha, then zyzy refuse to keep the toys that he find so interesting (dinosaur figurines) and started throwing his tantrums refusing to keep the toys. And refusing to let go. o...k...... so i walked over and told him zy, pls keep the toys and take a sit. i said it 3 times and he continued to refuse, so i took it and put the toys back. Of cos he cried and cried. Then i held his hand and said ok, lets take a sit like everybody else. He fllowed me and took his seat but of cos it was beside me la... lol
The teacher then started saying , "ok children, see this area with many books? you can put ur name tags that i have here (she show them the name tags attached with velcro) and stick them here and u can choose the books that u want and take a seat on the sofa here (pointing to the reading area) to read them. But put them back nicely ok? Its the same with the rest of the playing areas, and we will be putting up an art area here as well for paintings and crafts". I was "wow" i like it :D Then she started story telling , zy isnt into story tellng becos he is not able to sit down quietly and listen attentively so it was hard to try to make him sit down.. very soon 2 hrs was up and it was time to go home, so i thanked the teacher and told zyon it was time to go, and he was happy waving goodbye to everyone and high 5ing the teachers. OK, so that was 1st day.

I will update 2nd day soon!!! have to go tend the kids now!! LOL Chao!!